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Not everything that’s old is necessarily bad. Sometimes the beaten path is the shortest route between two points and also the easiest one to take. Sometimes even the boldest explorer wants to sit down and take a break. And why not? There must have been something nice in the old ways, otherwise people wouldn’t have clung to them for so long. This is also the case with the man-on-top sexual positions, which are seen today as either a boring or a male chauvinist proposition. But are they really such a bad idea? It’s true that a man who insists on being on top every time is no fun, but trying these positions every once in a while cannot be a bad idea.

The thing that makes or breaks these positions is communication. We all know that man-on-top positions are very good for the man, but we also know that the women don’t always get their pleasure this way. So couples need to learn to communicate during sex, because women must take the initiative and tell the men what feels good and what doesn’t. This can be a huge turn on for both partners and can help increase the intimacy by letting each partner know how the other feels.

Another good thing about man-on-top positions is the fact that they’re just great for newcomers. Boys who don’t have much experience with sex have an easier time learning to trust their own performance by being in a position of power. Lack of confidence is likely to make a young man lose his erection. However, being on top and in control at all times may actually help to boost confidence and, in time, drive away all fear. An inexperienced young lady will also benefit from letting the man take the lead and showing her a good time.

And, ladies, you don’t have to simply lie stiff on the bed! If you don’t want to just sit back and enjoy the ride, then join in the fun. Throw your legs around his hips. Caress his body while he thrusts and whisper sweet dirty things in his ears. He will be more aroused than ever knowing that you enjoy yourself to the fullest and will do his best to bring you to orgasm. And what’s the problem with letting the man think himself in control now and then? It’s good for both of you to change places in the seat of power. These positions can be a lot of fun if you know how to use them, so don’t knock them until you tried them.

The bottom line is that nearly every position can be fun for those lovers who know how to take advantage of it to have great sex and to strengthen the bond that keeps them together. Anything can be boring if you don’t make a little effort to turn it into something fun and the bedroom is the best place to learn that. Novelty has its place at the top of your sex life, but not every old-fashioned thing should be thrown away. You never know when it might prove just as delightful as it seemed to people long gone.

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Try as I might, I can’t remember having met anybody in my life who was satisfied with his or her sex life and didn’t want to change anything. And it’s not that sex was bad or anything. People simply want a lot of variation in their sex lives; they are always searching for the elusive “something else”. That’s how they get to enacting fantasies, using toys and other props, looking for new sex partners, trying different moods and locations, Or using alcohol and drugs to spice things up. Judging from the fast lives people have today and from their interest in being entertained all the time, I’d say there’s a lot of spice going around.



The top problem with drugs is that different people respond in different ways. This means there’s no guarantee as to the effects, much less when moods can also interfere with drugs. The second biggest problem is that drugs interfere with the flow of blood, motivation or arousal response. Let’s take a look at the most common drugs and their effects on love-making.

LSD, mescaline, psilocybin (magic mushrooms) and all the other psychedelic substances should really be left only to artists and adventurer types. The effects are much too unpredictable to be of any consistent use. While it’s true that these psychoactive substances make people much more aware of each other, they are also very unlikely to promote sexual arousal. Bad hallucinations and moods could turn sex into a traumatic trip best left outside your range of experiences.

Stimulants come next. Cocaine and amphetamines are stimulants of the nervous system and people take them to feel the cool rush to the brain. But they don’t always mix well with sex. Both cocaine and amphetamines are known to cause problems with achieving erections and orgasms. While making orgasm more difficult is a recipe for longer sex, this could also lead to chaffing of the intimate parts, something which is highly NOT recommended.

The same goes for opiates. Drugs like opium, codeine, morphine and heroin are well-known for decreasing the libido and making erections more difficult. And it’s only fair, if I may say so. The 30 seconds of pleasure given by sex are a poor match to the four or eight hours of euphoria and tranquillity generated by opiates. People who use opiates tend to experience solitary pleasures and do not feel the need to share that is crucial for sex. On the other hand, the self-contained sense of peace given by heroin is not the same as the shared moments of peace that bind a couple.

Ecstasy is yet another risky choice. Although MDMA makes people like each other, it is not recommended for sex. MDMA is more of an empathy drug that opens people up and makes them comfortable with themselves and friendly to others. Just like some of the above-mentioned substances, MDMA interferes with the sympathetic nervous system and impairs erections. Some Ecstasy users seek to offset this effect by taking Viagra at the same time as Ecstasy, which is not a good idea.

Arguably, the most important effect of all drugs is the obliteration of inhibitions and self-consciousness, which allows partners to enjoy sex more and to act out all repressed fantasies. However, the loss of inhibitions is also the reason why users of recreational drugs have unprotected sex with perfect strangers who don’t always mean well. Having a blast in bed is a great experience. Waking up with various STDs, without the wallet and keys and at a completely unknown location next to a completely unknown person who doesn’t look as good as she/he did last night, is not.

In the end, the choice is yours. If you want to take a chance and risk your health and life, a simple article isn’t going to stop you. Still, for your sake try to pause and think before taking any unnecessary risks. Have fun, but stay safe.

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Having sex for the first time is, or should be, a wonderful experience. It’s true that the lack of experience and a dozen other things all conspire to make it less than amazing in terms of sheer sex, but the thing that matters most is the experience itself. There is always a first time for the body and a first time for the soul. Some people have it both at the same time, while others get to the physical act before finding somebody they really care about. Still, anything is fair in love and war and people should be free to do as they please as long as they don’t bother anybody else.

Many young men and women worry about little details, such as when exactly to have sex, whether at his or her house or at a completely different location, which condoms to buy and so on. All these things are simply details, and you should do whatever you both feel comfortable with. If you’re planning to have sex in the late evening after coming back from a club or disco, then you should both go easy on the alcohol. You probably want some nice memories from this experience instead of a vague recollection due to alcohol.

Pick a place where you are not likely to be bothered for some time. The car is OK for necking, but should not be used for sex; it’s no longer hip to do it in a car anyway. So I’d say that a beds or sofas are still the best places for sex, especially for first time sex. Just make sure that the bed or the sofa is located in a room where you are not likely to be disturbed. Taking a shower together before the main event could add a lot to the intimacy and sheer sexiness of the moment.

The biggest problem every person has when engaging in sex for the first time is the fact that he or she does not know how to please the other and only has a vague idea of how to get pleasure in return. This is why everything is so awkward and people get embarrassed and stressed. However, this is exactly what they should not do. Take your time to explore her or his body and guide the other’s hands to the pleasure spots of your own body. This is what sex is all about anyway.

Naturally, the number one worries are “What if I can’t get it up?” for the men and “Does it hurt?” for the ladies. Nothing could be more embarrassing for a young man than to see that the penis that used to stand to attention at the sight of every pretty girl has decided to take some time off at the exact moment when the owner needed it the most. As for girls, many have probably heard a lot of unpleasant first time experiences and are more than a little apprehensive about the whole thing. The best answer for both partners is to go slow and have a lot of patience with each other.

Nobody is a good lover on the first try. Guys worry about not being able to achieve erection, ejaculating too soon, not being big enough and not pleasing their partners. Ladies worry about the possible pain, the birth control pills and about not achieving orgasm despite the best efforts of their partners. Such is life. The first time should be cherished as your entry into a different world and your first attempt to share your intimacy with somebody else. If the results are less then spectacular, it’s OK. You have a whole life ahead of you to sharpen your skills.

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Spontaneous sex is like spice on a good relationship. While we all know that women like being wined, dined and sixty-nined at leisure before intercourse, the risk of getting caught and the thrill of deciding to go for it on the spur of the moment can very effectively replace foreplay. Of course there are unpleasant thoughts regarding the consequences of getting caught, which usually range from getting fired to being forever known as a pair of loose individuals who don’t have the decency to abstain from sex while in public. And, of course, someone may actually call the police. But all these only add to the reasons why you should try having sex outside the house.

If you want to do it, but get cold feet and decide to postpone the moment, it’s ok. You don’t have to rush it and sex outside the house is not mandatory. But it is lots of fun. For one thing, this kind of sex requires boldness and determination, which is something women admire in men. It also requires planning ahead. Men should wear zippered trousers and boxers; things that can be pulled down and back up in a second. Women should wear skirts; and not very long skirts, if you please. You need something that won’t get in the way. Get a pack of sanitary napkins with you and some of that no rinse antiseptic handwash for the after action cleaning.

Since trips to the parents are a regular part of most couples’ lives, you could try to start there. It doesn’t really matter if you’re going to do it at your parents or at her parents’ place. So, whenever you feel comfortable with the idea and naughty enough to take the chance, sneak out with an excuse and go for it. Do it on the kitchen table, while the coffee maker is on and you’re waiting for coffee. Follow your lady into the bathroom and have hot sex in there. The garage is also a good place for sex. Not particularly inviting, but this is not the time to be choosy. Frankly, any free room is fair target. Just be careful not make a lot of noise.

And where could one get hotter sex than in the sauna. You’re both hot and you’re both naked and relaxed; what else could one ask for? Sex is practically in the air. Not to mention that the tiered benches in saunas let you try a variety of positions. Just find one that you are both comfortable with and have at it. The only thing that you should keep in mind about sauna sex is that the heat and perspiration will make any effort hard to perform. Fainting, dizziness, heart attacks and dehydration are the most common risks faced by those who like sauna sex. So keep the movement to a minimum and you should be fine.

Ahh, the great outdoors. Well, actually it’s the smaller outdoors that you’re interested in. The one where vegetation or big objects can hide two people having sex. Yes, this means having sex in the park or in an alley. If you’re going for the park, try to find a reasonably secluded spot that is also comfortable. No thorns, no unpleasant branches and no mud or garbage. If you think an alley is more to your style, find one where parked cars can hide you, preferably one that is not faced by fifty windows or so. In both cases, your best bet is to have sex standing up, preferably with the man penetrating the woman from behind. This will let you scan the area while having sex.

Having sex in the office must be one of the most common fantasies about the nine-to-five population. A hot work mate hints at being ready and willing for a date and the next thing you know, your brain takes over and starts looking for opportunities everywhere. The storage room suddenly looks like a godsend: it is cluttered and has a door that can be locked or blocked. Working late is also on the list of things that start to sound good. If both of you should work late, there’s no telling what might happen. Just be careful not to get caught. It’s bad enough to lose your job; you don’t want to also get a certain reputation that could make future employment difficult.

The risks are high, but it’s also very much worth it. It’s a basic act of defiance that can be exhilarating for anyone and a wonderful thing to share with your partner. It will make for excellent memories later on.

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In many cases relationships are a contest between two individuals. Each of the two partners wants to get as much control as possible in order to make his or her life as easy as possible. Smart couples learn early on to split the work and help each other, while also splitting the pleasure. This attitude holds just as true for sex as for the daily life together. Each partner should learn how to please the other and be pleased in his/her turn. The old role that tradition dictates for men and women are not mandatory anymore and so lovers have a chance to experiment.

The woman-on-top sexual positions are just such experiments. They are a way of turning the old order upside-down by letting the woman control the intercourse, while the man can sit back, relax and enjoy the show. Frankly, the basic position, also known in the US as the Cowgirl position, is a win-win situation for both partners. The woman gets to have full control of the penetration and to stimulate her clitoris in order to reach orgasm and the man can get a lot of pleasure with practically no effort. Moreover, the man is free to make the most of the situation by caressing the woman’s breasts and playing with her clitoris.

There are many positions featuring the woman on top and trying them out should be a lot of fun for any couple who wants to keep bedroom boredom away. One of the best things about these positions is that, unlike the missionary position, the woman can move around to make sure that the penis hits all the hotspots of her sensitive vagina. This is on top of the delightful grinding of the penis against the clitoris, which is sure to send the woman over the edge. Can you say guaranteed orgasm for both partners?

However, there are a lot of woman-on-top positions and it’s not always “lie back and enjoy” for the man. Sometimes the man has to do all the thrusting, especially if the woman has her back to him and assumes a reclining position. Other times he has to use his arms to pull the woman toward himself, because certain positions are based on this kind of movement. But we all know that there’s not reason why men should not enjoy these positions.

And a piece of advice for the guys: your attitude is important! Don’t get angry or aloof if your lady wants to be on top because you’d simply come across as fools who don’t know a good thing when they see it. So what if she wants to get on top? All the better for you, because it’s free pleasure. Not to mention that it will really win you points with the lady for being a sensitive guy and knowing how to please her, while getting your kicks at the same time. Let go of the cliché male-on-top position and enjoy the ride. If, on the other hand, the lady wants to use the opportunity as a hint that your regular performance is not all that’s cracked up to be, then take the hint and get busy learning how to please her.

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Bringing a man to orgasm is a relatively simple thing. A nice joke claimed once that all a woman has to do to please a man is to show up naked and bring beer. Although this is a simplification of the male sexuality, it serves to show that it doesn’t take much for a man to reach sexual pleasure. Pleasing a woman, however, is quite something else, as any man can confirm. Men tend to rely on a fast and none too subtle approach. Women like to see things unfolding a bit differently. So I think the men need a little helping hand to get the entire thing right, which is why I picked a couple of sex positions that are fun, fun, fun for the ladies.

The first position we are going to discuss is the good old missionary style. I know that the first thing that comes to mind when the words “missionary position” are encountered is “BORING!”. However, this parochial technique is delightfully suited for her orgasm because the man’s pubic mound is rubbing against the woman’s clitoris. This will help the woman reach orgasm quicker, especially if the savvy man puts a pillow under the lady’s shapely bottom and aims for the G-spot. Even though missionary doesn’t sound like a lot of fun, it can be the very thing for those smart enough to make the most of it.

Another good position for the woman is doggy style. This position is extremely arousing for men because they have the sight of a sexy ass to feast their eyes upon and they can also control the movement very well. Plus, they can reach around and play with the woman’s clitoris, which is as close as it gets to a surefire way to get the lady over the edge. The direct stimulation of the clitoris and the deep penetration afforded by the doggy style position are excellent for fast and intense orgasms, especially if you’re into quickies. Just make sure you keep a finger on her clitoris.

And this article would not be complete with the undisputed leader of positions designed to enhance the woman’s pleasure: her on top. This is a major turn on for both men and women, although for different reasons. Men like the position because they can lay back and watch the show, while the woman is doing all the work. Moreover, men get to have a great view of their ladies and to play with their breasts if they feel like moving their hands. The ladies like the position because it gives them full control. They can set the pace of sex and make sure their clitoris is rubbing hard against the man’s pubic area each time she sinks down. It’s heaven for both man and woman.

And a nice variation of the “her on top” position can be tried in a chair. Get a chair without arms and which is sturdy enough to support your combined weight and the subsequent rocking. Sit on the chair and let the lady straddle you. The curve of your stomach and torso will make it impossible for her clitoris not to rub on your pubic area. And if that rubbing is not intense enough, don’t be shy, give the lady a hand. If you can support her with just one hand, use the other to play with her clitoris and make her orgasm like crazy. For even more fun, turn her around and try to find the G-spot with your penis. This should be a lot of fun.

It’s not that hard to give your lady orgasms. The trick is to get her hot with sexy foreplay and then to have sex in a position that would stimulate both her clitoris and vagina. If she’s not enjoying herself enough, then step in and take control of the situation. Use your fingers or your penis to target the clitoris directly and make her squeal with pleasure. And you’ll see that she’s going to love you for this.

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For young people sex is something very desirable, yet risky. There are a million things to think about before getting to the actual job and each one of them seems to be absolutely crucial to the success of the first night with someone special. And it’s perfectly natural that they should want to seek help from those who have already been through the whole thing before them. Uncertainty and anxiety are part of the fun during those years when sex is still a new thing and one is not completely comfortable with one’s body. Later on the novelty wears out to be replaced by experience and skill.

Teens want to know how to tell if the time is right for this step, if the person they fancy is the right one to be trusted in such an important moment, what the parents would say if they found out and many other things. Girls are wondering what to wear and how to behave, while boys are unsure whether they come across as self-assured enough for the job. A dozen years later on, all these “problems” will become fond memories. People look at what they thought to be important back then and smile because things have turned out very different than they had expected.

So, for those who need a couple of pointers here’s the straight deal. First and foremost, sex is not mandatory. Yep, you heard that right. Don’t rush to sex just because other people think it’s cool or even required of you by a certain age. That is utterly stupid! There is no requirement, no deadline and you should not be ashamed of your choices. If you don’t feel as comfortable as possible with the idea, don’t do it. It’s that simple. It’s your life and it’s your body so feel free to do as you please.

Before you jump in bed with someone, you should take some time to educate yourself. Sex is heavenly, but there is always the risk of unwanted pregnancies or STIs. It’s one of the most ironic things that many youths know about condoms and are aware of the hazards of not using them, but that does not change the situation much. Condoms still get left in a drawer or people simply forget to buy them and soon both partners are getting close to the bed and there’s no time to think about such things anymore.

But it’s far better to take the time to buy condoms and to educate yourself about the risks instead of spending time on the grim hallways of the WD ward. It doesn’t matter if the ward looks kind of cool or not. Having to wait there for test results is bad. Having to go there for treatment is even worse. Buying a condom is easy; waiting for the envelope with the HIV test results is hard. No teen-ager should have to go through this, but it happens.

The bottom line is that you should have sex only when you think you have sufficient information to be able to understand your actions and their consequences. Do it when you can comfortably discuss sex and feelings not only with your close friends, but also with that special person. Do it when you can carry condoms around with you without blushing if they are found on you. And if you feel you need advice, don’t hesitate to ask. Going in prepared is like winning half the battle from the start.

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Relationships, affairs, one-night stands, marriages. All these words mean more or less the same type of link between two persons. The only difference lies in the time the two spend together, in what they do together and in the details that give a distinct personality to their… relationship. In most cases, the thing that brings two persons together is physical attraction, which is sooner or later followed by the complex dance of passion.

Most lasting relationships are built around qualities that matter in the long run. The things that can still keep two people together after the initial infatuation with each other has passed. Trust, honesty, respect, sensitivity, shared likes and dislikes are the building blocks of any relationship that has stood the test of time. Sex is another building block, since the physical side of a relationship needs to be reinforced and reaffirmed time and again.

Sex is the strongest binding element of most relationships. While the initial passion runs its course and dies, it is replaced by other things. The eagerness is replaced by a more experienced approach to each other’s needs and wishes. Partners with years of sex behind them usually have a through knowledge of each other’s responses to stimulation. These people know very well the importance of sex for the overall health of their life together.

When sex goes stale the entire relationship is at risk. Routine, stress, greener pastures, the daily exposure to beauty standards and other temptations of the modern world can make people forget how important the physical relation to their partners is. On the other hand, many people know they have to go the extra mile in order to please their partners in bed. Toys, costumes, fantasies, penis enlargement, romantic dinners and dates, all of these can are used to bring back the old flame and show that the passion isn’t gone forever.

One such trick that is sure to come easy for every man is VolumePills. These natural pills are filled with herbal ingredients that will pump up your sex drive and make your lady wonder at the new playful mood you’re in. The pills will also open your blood vessels in order to bring more blood to the penis and get you maximum erections and a faster response to stimulation every time.

Of course we have saved the sweetest thing for the end paragraphs. VolumePills will also increase the amount of sperm produced by the testicles. Since male orgasm depends directly on how long the male can ejaculate, this means longer and more powerful orgasms for you. Buy VolumePills today and surprise your lady with a big erection while putting at the same time a big smile on your face with a mind blowing orgasm.

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Virginity is one of the big shackles of youth. One of those things that young people are very nervous about. And it’s no wonder that things are like that. Everyday we are all subjected to nudity and sex wherever we go. Advertising, magazine covers, newspapers, websites and small talk, all revolve around sex. There’s so much information that everybody is expected to know a lot about sex. If one is caught unaware of the trendy sex positions, the latest sex jokes or out of synch with the popular attitude on some issue or other, that person is seen as out of touch with reality. If you add virginity to the whole thing, it gets even worse.

Traditionally, virginity has been associated with naïveté and with a certain lack of knowledge about the important facts of life. Virginity still conjures images of blushing maidens from the 19th century and the person who admits to still being a virgin at the age of 16, 17, 18, 19 or whatever, is seen as a completely inexperienced individual, as the world at large conveniently forgets that one must be born deaf and blind not to know nearly all the theory on sex before fifth grade. The age of first intercourse has been dropping steadily over the past decades for both boys and girls. And that’s just first intercourse. Oral sex starts earlier.

There seems to be a whole lot of sex going on. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that this is a bad thing, but I object to sex being seen as some kind of ultimate thing in life, right next to money. I don’t like to see young people feeling pressured into having early and risky sex. I don’t like to read news about young girls going to the abortion clinic, just because other people with not a lot of brains told them that sex is a really good idea without mentioning condoms or pills. Frankly, I think that this is the only thing that shows how inexperienced virgin youths are. If you’re willing to have risky sex just to prove to your friends that you can do it, then you don’t know much about this world.

What all youths should understand is that being a virgin or not is a private issue. It’s nobody’s business what you are and what you’re not. People who tell you that losing your virginity is some kind of magic ticket to the land of mature, sophisticated and knowledgeable people are lying. Maturity comes with age and not with an early and hurried intercourse. Chasing girls or boys around and being willing to get laid at any price is not a mature or sophisticated attitude. If you want to lose your virginity, then find a person whom you have feelings for and who is likely to share your feelings.

There is no universal rule about the age at which one should get rid of the virgin status. We are unique individuals and the only good answer to the eternal question “When should I have sex for the first time” is “Whenever you feel ready”. Rushing to take advantage of the first opportunity that comes along is like playing the Russia roulette. You might score big, but then again, you might end up in a very bad situation. If you really want to have sex, then take the trouble to educate yourself about the hazards because thirty seconds of pleasure should not be paid with two weeks of fear while waiting for test results.

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Some men don’t know how to put on a condom. Don’t smirk or feel embarrassed, there’s no need for either of these attitudes here. Some guys have little experience when it comes to sex. Others have little experience in the use of condoms and prefer to go natural. So what? We all have to learn sometimes; nobody was born wise. Luckily, putting on a condom is not a big deal at all and any man, or woman for that matter, can get the hang of it in a couple of minutes. If you feel you need to practice, by all means go ahead. Condoms can be bought from any pharmacy or from the vending machines installed in public loos.

What you need is an erect penis or its equivalent, such as a banana or anything else that might resemble a penis and is hard enough to keep from bending. Take one condom out of the pack and open the foil carefully by tearing away one side. The most important thing is to keep the condom inside undamaged. If you manage to bungle this step and damage the condom, get another from the pack. Never go ahead with a torn condom because it is perfectly useless. So make sure you learn how to tear the foil correctly.

Next, take the condom out of the torn foil and take a look at it. You will notice that a small tip is hanging on one side of the condom. But this tip contains a bit of air at this moment and air inside the condom is not a good idea. So grab the tip between your thumb and forefinger and gently squeeze the air out. Keep your fingers on the tip and place the condom as it is on the head of your penis. Use your other hand to roll the condom down the length of your penis.

This was the final stage of the whole thing. Now you are ready for sex. What you need to make sure is that no air has entered the condom because it will form pockets that are very likely to break during sex. Also watch out because the condom might start to slip off your penis. If you are completely new to condoms, buy a couple of sizes and try them all to see which fits you best.

When you’re done, pull out and start taking the condom off. You’d better do this out of the bed, some distance from the lady’s vagina. It would be a bummer to have sex with the condom on only to spill the load while taking the thing off you. The best way to remove it is to grab the tip as before and start pulling your penis out. Wrap the used condom in tissue paper and throw it in the garbage can. Now you’re all done.

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Kinky sex is a bit like using random spices on food. The result will certainly be interesting, but you can never be certain in what way. Fact is we all have different pleasures and turn-ons, things that we would very much like to experience in bed. It’s perfectly natural to wish to go beyond the average sex movements and to let go of your inhibitions in order to enhance the pleasure we’re getting out of one of the most intimate acts in our lives. The only problem is that your partner may be into becoming uninhibited, but not in your particular way. Still, most times the only problem is the fact that she or he hasn’t tried your particular brand of kinky sex and is unsure of how it feels like. This makes it your duty to introduce the other to kinky pleasures in a gentle manner and to accept her or his pleasures in your turn. Every person is very attached to his or her fantasies and pleasures and would like nothing better than to have the significant other share them, which is why a common fantasy is to surprise your lover with a fetish or a role playing experience and to discover that your lover is crazy about it. However, this fantasy is just that: a fantasy. If you really wish to make your dreams come true don’t spring anything on anyone. Fantasies come in all shapes, sizes and numbers. Unless you’re turned on by three dancing midgets and a singing goat, you’re not that special. But don’t expect your partner to know this. She or he will be surprised enough to learn that you have a fetish or a fantasy. The secret of a good approach is to discuss it first. And don’t expect to get everything over with in a single conversation on the topic; your lover may need convincing. Take the time to talk your lover into this and you might be surprised with the results. We all have things that we’d like to try in bed, not to mention a sense of adventure. Stimulate it and you’ll find that even a prudish person is willing to go along with some unusual ideas. With a little encouragement and by handing full control to your partner, you can get anybody interested in kinky sex. Using the right combination of description and convincing you could talk your lady into spanking, using sex toys or handcuffs, anal sex, role play or whatever comes to your mind. Just don’t force anybody into anything. It’s far better for you to slowly work the partner up to wanting a spanking now and then or to fantasize about dressing up and playing the master and the maid or the teacher and pupil. This way you’ll be both interested in the fetish and sex will be all the more pleasant. Wouldn’t you like your lover to ASK for anal sex? Try to make everything sound fun and talk your partner slowly into this. If you’re going for role playing, let the lady choose her own clothes; better still, shop together. Dressing up as a tasteless maid is not on any woman’s wish list. If you’re far more experienced at using sex toys than your lover, take the time to explain their function and all the pleasures that are in store for those open-minded enough to use them. Be careful about it, some men get defensive when they have to share their partner with a big plastic penis. This is actually the basic rule of successful kinky sex: always be mindful of the other and heavenly pleasure will follow.

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Good massaging is a highly prized skill. Whether it’s the weary man coming home to a relaxing massage or the busy woman drowsing pleasantly under the strong hands of a trained masseur, anybody loves a good strong rubbing that banishes the stiffness accumulated through the long hours spent in the office. It’s even better when massage turns intimate and the session ends up in more rubbing than anticipated. The good thing is that you only need two things to make this happen: skill and a good lubricant. Granted, the lubricant is not absolutely necessary, but many people use it and a bit of advice on what to use and how has never hurt anyone.

For any massage you can choose between using massage oils, massage lotions, warming oils, talcum powder and water-based lubricants. It’s all a matter of preferences, although some products are not exactly recommended for massages. Massage oils are always a good idea if you and your partner don’t mind them (some people can’t stand the idea of being covered in an oily substance). You can buy both scented and unscented oils, so shop around a bit and find what manner of scent and texture you like. Make sure you read the label before you try to use the oil alongside latex products, such as sex toys and condoms because they usually don’t go well together. Massage oil should not be used on the inner part of the genitals, nor as a lubricant for penetration, unless the label says it’s safe to do that.

Massage lotions are a better choice for those who don’t like the greasy film left behind by oils. Lotions are less slippery, which makes it easier for the person giving a massage to work with the body, and are less likely to cause breakouts. People who have the oily type of skin should stay away from massage oils anyway, so lotions should be the ideal choice. If you enjoy them, you should try to find some scented massage lotions. They leave less of the sticky residue behind and add to the mood by making both partners smell sexy. However, just like oils, lotions will degrade or destroy latex products and should not be used for vaginal or anal play.

Warming oils, also known as edible oils, are the best option for a small, localized massage, instead of a full body massage. If you wish to make your partner really hot, you can use warming oil on the genitals, before sex. Rub it into the skin gently until the oil begins to heat up and your partner starts to feel aroused. Remember that warming oils are subject to the same restrictions of use as the massage oils and lotions. Again, the label should let you know if the oil can be used with latex products or not.

Talcum powder can be used by those who hate the feeling of oils or lotions on their skin. Be warned that it does not work as well as oils because it does not allow much friction. Water-based lubricants are only marginally better than talcum. Some of them, such as KY Jelly, tend to dry very quickly and turn into a sticky residue. KY Liquid and Astroglide are better suited for massage because they take longer to dry out and absorb more friction. The best thing about water-based lubricants, however, is that they are meant to work with latex products, such as condoms and sex toys. This means that you can use them without any problem if you plan to move from massage to sex.

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